Monday, January 12, 2009

Earning Gold Stars

Okay, time to 'fess up. I am officially intimidated by blog world. I don't know what I was thinking when I signed on for this task, but clearly I didn't do my homework.


See, I love to journal. Before I had kids, I filled pages and pages of pretty blank books with random thoughts and prayers and story ideas. After Ella was born, though, I lost my energy for writing. Then the twins came, and I lost my time for it, too. By the time Ty was born, there wasn't a reason for me to even buy a journal. I was never going to fill it; it was just going to sit on my nightstand and remind me of a time when I had... well, energy and time.


Last spring, however, I was sitting in church and ignoring for what seemed like the hundredth time an overwhelming desire write. I was ignoring it, because there didn't seem to be much point in my desire. I was a mom with four kids under four - still with no energy, and no time, and now, no journal. But as I wrestled with my frustration, inspiration struck. I know what I need, I thought. Accountability! Of course I'm not motivated to write, because I have nobody keeping me accountable to the task. After all, why would I write, when I can sleep?


I brainstormed awhile more, and decided that the best approach to creating accountability would be a weekly e-mail to family and friends. Just a little blurb about my days at home with the kids; something to help me hone my skills through consistent practice. Up until that point, I'd never even heard of blogging - except in the form of professional journalists writing on important topics such as last week's American Idol performances. But when I got home from church, there was an e-mail waiting for me in my inbox from the dear friend you all know as Mom2Drew; she was "outting" herself to family and friends as a blogger.


Blogging? I didn't even know that could be used as a verb! But Mom2Drew seemed to offer a solution to my problem of accountability. If she can put herself out there like this, then so can I, right? Over the next two weeks, I wrote a few practice blogs, worked up some confidence, and e-mailed my friend for her blessing - which she gave, since clearly I was clueless as to just how many people are out there doing this blogging thing!


And now here I am, completely intimidated by the world I've been writing in for the last eight months, because I had no idea until recently how big blog world really is. And how pretty every body's blog backgrounds are. And how many pictures can be posted on a blog. And how creative everybody is, reminding me that I don't really have anything new to offer to a world that obviously has is all.


Wow.


Isn't that just like the enemy? I mean, God didn't speak from a burning bush and tell me to write. But He did give me a passion and a desire to write. Yet for years I've avoided doing the very thing I love because I didn't feel I had the time or because, more recently, the confidence. The enemy gave me plenty of excuses, and I've been using them all.


The truth is, I really don't have anything new to offer blog world. Even Solomon, arguably the wisest man to ever live, said, "What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun." (Ecc. 1:9). Obviously, I'm not the first mom to have four children in four years. For crying out loud, TLC has an entire program dedicated to a mom who had eight children in four years! So my thoughts and advice aren't going to be original. But I'm going to put them out there anyway. I just need the right motivation: accountability.


When I was a kid, I loved gold stars. It didn't matter that all I got was a gold star; I worked hard for that sticker. But occasionally, I got to cash in my gold stars for a bigger prize. So I'm thinking, why not make myself a gold star chart? I have ten weeks until my 33rd birthday. I'm going to commit to blogging something twice a week for the next ten weeks. Every blog = 1 gold star. And when I get twenty gold stars, I'm going to cash them in for.................. drum roll please................ a blog makeover! (Because how cool is Mom2Drew's new blog? You've got to check it out.)


Unfortunately, I don't know how to make a cyber- gold star chart, so you're going to have to trust me on this - or start counting my bogs. (Because you don't have a life, right?) Unfortunately, you're also going to have to read my blogs on this depressingly bland page, because I'm going to use it to motivate me. However, I will, as per my mother's request, try to start adding more pictures. Because my kids - however insane they make me - are pretty darn cute. I'll even include one now:




See? Adorable.

OK, so wish me luck, and keep checking back. Hopefully the kids will give me some material to work with - and leave a portion of my mind intact - so that I can write some moderately entertaining blogs for all of you out there in blog world.

Ooops, gotta run. American Idol just started.

5 comments:

Jenny said...

So... I was driving home from an errand this morning, just pondering YOU (I'm not making this up) and how God used you several months ago to get me through that panicked feeling of being overwhelmed by the blog world and by my unoriginality and lack of talent and, well, just read your own post again. I have a feeling you understand. And how YOUR email with the subject line "blog" just magically appeared in my inbox to give me the boost I needed to keep going.

God has called you to write. He bestowed a talent that knocks my socks off every time I read your words. And this is your training ground. So, put on your workout clothes, girl. I'll be the toughest bloggy bootcamp instructor you've ever met. Twice a week - from here until your 33rd.
I LOVE YOU!!!!!!

MindyMac said...

All I can do is say "Amen" to JD's comment! She is right. You are, by the way, feeling what I think ALL of us feel in the blogging world.....what do I have to offer? I really have nothing new or earth shattering to say at all! I feel that way all of the time! You are honing a craft, and a lot of people LOVE to read what you have to say! So go earn a gold star!!!

Shawna said...

Kari, I am so excited about your new challenge to yourself. I have to admit that I have been checking back on your blog since your November post waiting for more. You have such a wonderful talent and I'm so glad that I found your blog so I can enjoy it! I'm looking forward to getting more insight into your busy life! Welcome back!!

Cstargel said...

Cant wait! Love everything ou write!

Beth said...

I found your blog through Mom2Drews (who I found in the MomSense magazine from MOPS) and thought I'd offer a little encouragement to you. I think you're a GREAT writer and you always seem to have a way of expressing your thoughts that really makes me think about things differently. I'm excited that you're going to post more frequently - though as a mom of twins myself, I would totally understand if you didn't have the time to do it. Check out my blogs if you have time (365fox.blogspot.com and the-path-less-traveled.blogspot.com). Leave a comment any time you want!

Happy Blogging!
Beth